Where to Begin?

First, I'm home. Home Sweet Home!! I came home last night at 5:00 pm. I'm feeling good - very sore. I probably look worse than I feel (smile).

I will back up and start from the morning of the 17th - at least what I can remember. Oh...and I'm on pain relievers so I pray this makes sense.

We got the kids off to school and headed off to the hospital. On our way I placed a call to Pastor Ike Riddle in Texas. I've never had a surgery in the last 13 years that he hasn't prayed with me before and I wasn't going to start now. Just hearing his voice comforted me. When we arrived at the hospital they said they were ready for me because the surgeon was ahead of schedule and they wanted to get started with me early. They started calling for me before the nurse could even go through her paper work. In the end I only went in 15 minutes early.

I have to confess that I was doing really well but as soon as I laid down on the gurney my dad walked in and it finally hit me. The nausea and water works began. The nurses were amazing. My friend Cheryl Beal was working and she had her co-workers making sure they were giving me extra special care. They allowed all the family that was there to come in and then they had Jim pray for me. I just got so nervous. When my cousin Kellie got there she was able to get my mind on to other things and helped the nurses prepare me for the surgery. Kellie is an RN and normally works in the emergency room in Glendora. Kel had to drive from Upland and was explaining an accident that happened on the 15 freeway with a FedEx truck. I only mention this because it becomes key in the coming hour.

My surgery nurse came in and asked if I had gone to Nuclear medicine. I had no idea what that meant at first. She was referring to having dye run through my system before the surgery so that they could detect the lymph nodes. I was told they weren't going to preform this procedure earlier that week. It caused great confusion with doctors and nurses. I was concerned that my surgery would be delayed. My nurse finally came in to say they were not going to do that procedure. I requested to meet with the doctor so I could understand how the lymph nodes would be removed. Dr. W came to see me and explained they were advised not to run the procedure because my mass was so large that they needed to remove as many lymph nodes as they could to detect if there was cancer. She went into more detail but I really can't remember all she said. When that was cleared up I was ready to go. Dr. M had already came in and took a pen to me. Jim and Kellie had wanted to draw pictures on me for the doctors. Once Kellie realized it wouldn't come off very well I was able to talk them out of it.

I made sure as they were pushing me to surgery I was smiling and singing. In the hallway the anesthesiologist injected some "happy juice." When I went into the surgery room they had music playing. Can't remember what was playing but it sounded as if I was arriving at a party. They moved me on to the surgery table and began to strap all the equipment on and then someone said that they needed to stop. My reconstructive expanders that were going to be placed during the surgery were supposed to arrive from FedEx and hadn't arrived yet. Well...what do you think went through my mind immediately. I just knew that those expanders were on the FedEx truck that was in that accident Kellie had seen. My family had no idea what was going on but they did see someone come from FedEx with a box that was delivered and rushed down stairs. The "happy juice" kept me relaxed and about 20 minutes later they said they had received the expanders and immediately began hooking me up again. The mask went on my face and then 5 minutes later I woke up. OK, it was actually 4 hours but it felt like 5 minutes to me.

The surgery went faster than they expected. The cancer was located on top of the breast tissue. I had actually showed the doctors a red spot that had appeared on Tuesday and they said the cancer was actually trying to pop out of the skin. They removed 15 lymph nodes. 5 looked abnormal. It will take 7 to 10 days to get the pathology results. The doctor explained that just because the nodes looked abnormal it doesn't mean there is cancer in them. The surgeon though believes because my mass was so large I will have to go through Chemo. We'll have all the results by Dec. 30th and we will go from there. Now is just the time for recovery.

I know Jim has already thanked everyone for their prayers and I have to tell you I felt them. I did the best I have ever done after surgery. I had none of the normal complications I've had before. Within the first two hours after surgery Kellie had me up going to the bathroom. I really couldn't believe it. As most of us know the hospital is just not a place to get any rest. I didn't sleep until I got home last night. I was able to sleep on and off during the night. I only had to have Jim help me up once. I've come home with three drainage tubes (Yuck!!) and a pain pump. Jim says I look like I'm hooked up to go to space. I can't use my left arm which is very annoying. If I forget and use it the pain is terrible. I have limited use of my right arm but I'm so thankful I have that use. At least I can reach for something to drink and am able to feed myself.

It has felt wonderful sitting up and typing this to you. I will continue to write. It helps. Your support has been amazing.

Traci