Road Trip

Whether I want to or not my journey continues on the road...most likely to UCLA.

Yesterday the news wasn't good, but then it wasn't bad either.

What do we know?

• I don't have lung cancer.
• I don't have Lupus.
• I don't have fungi in my lungs.
• I don't have any micro bacteria in my lungs.
• I do have chronic inflammation.
• My lung capacity is significantly decreased (trust me, I already knew that).
• I have scarring and fibrosis of the lungs.
• Most likely it's not reversible.

What we don't know...

• How I got Interstitial lung disease?
• What caused the scar tissue?
• How do I get better?

Basically, we didn't find out anything new.

As of today I'm being referred to The Department of Medicine, Division of Pulmonary and Critical Care Medicine, Interstitial Lung Disease Center. With insurance approval, scheduling, paperwork, etc., it could take three to four weeks before I get an appointment.

This is what my doctor printed out for me that was listed on their website:

"Interstitial lung disease (ILD) includes many diseases all of which are characterized by scarring and fibrosis of the lungs. The majority of these diseases have no known cause and are termed "idiopathic". The UCLA Interstitial Lung Disease Center is an integrated, multidisciplinary regional referral center that provides comprehensive evaluation and treatment of patients with interstitial lung disease. The center has active ongoing clinical and basic research programs investigating new approaches to the treatment of these disabling diseases."

So right now, you know as much as I do.

My first thought, "No, way!" My first reaction - tears.

My second thought, "God, you have a plan and a purpose in all of this."

Today, I just felt numb. I honestly can't believe this is happening.

I just want it to all go away. I want to be done with doctors, tests, and medical facilities.

I was released to have my reconstruction surgery. The Pulmonologist said, "With the tube down your throat you'll at least be breathing at 100%, so there is no danger." I wasn't sure I liked the statement, but I was glad I can finally have the expander removed. I feel like I'm carrying a rock in my chest.

When I woke up, there was a verse that I kept hearing, but I had no idea where it was located. I looked up the word "crooked" in the back of my Bible. I found the verse (in Isaiah of course).

"Every valley shall be exalted and every mountain and hill shall be made low; The crooked places shall be made straight, and the rough places smooth; The glory of the LORD shall be revealed, and all flesh, shall see it together, for the mouth of the LORD has spoken." Isaiah 40:4-5.

With all my heart I know He is in the details. There is a reason I'm on this path. I might see windy roads ahead but God sees straight ones.

Only He knows how He is going to get me to Los Angeles. Anyone who really knows me understands this statement. I guess that's why He told me He'll make those rough places smooth for me. I'm just not crazy about road trips (unless I'm in a motor home).

I'll keep you updated as I learn or hear more.