Painful Healing

It seems almost impossible that I could be dealing with another complication along this journey.

No one mentioned that there could be any adverse effects that could happen from the Venogram, so I wasn’t prepared mentally. I’ve learned that if I can prepare myself I seem to handle things much better. I realize that no one probably could have known.

Every day this week my pain was unpredictable. I saw my primary doctor on Monday who immediately set up a meeting with a pain management doctor. She felt he would know better on how to handle my pain. I was able to see him on Tuesday. I was expecting that he would look over my medications and adjust them. I wasn’t expecting an injection in the main nerve. He told me to go home and put ice on my back (the area of the injection). I told him I wasn’t going home but back to work so I stopped by the pharmacy and purchased ice packs.

My arm began to feel very strange and my hand felt like it was an expanding sponge. I probably shouldn’t have been driving. My back that had no pain was now throbbing and has hurt ever since. (I’m sitting here typing with an ice pack on it). When I got to work I told Lynn what the doctor told me to do. We had to figure out a way to keep the ice pack on my back and work at the same time. Lynn put the ice pack in a plastic bag and used a binder clip to attach it around my neck. I looked ridiculous. One of my co-workers said I was a sad excuse for a poor superhero. Another one said I was officially a dork. I hurt so bad that I could care less what I looked like. I’m not sure what I was to expect from the injection but I’m guessing it was unsuccessful and seemed to make my hand swell more.

My pain has been very frustrating but losing the use of my left hand has been more challenging. I can’t even write about everything I have struggled with. I was very upset that I couldn’t tie my tennis shoes. Jim has had to open every jar he thinks I will need to use each morning. My family has been very helpful. I know this last week has been tough for them watching me struggle through the pain.

Friday I was just miserable. The pain was out of control. I put a call into the pain doctor. My boss sent me home at 3:00. I went home, put an ice pack on, and waited for the doctor to call. I fell asleep and he never called. Jim’s mom called and wanted to take me to the ER but I refused. I just couldn’t go. It was a long night. On Saturday I decided to double my medication. It took the edge off. I’m hoping that the pain doctor will able to assist me in determining what the right dose is.

I was able to go to church today and enjoy the company of our church family. It is always the best medicine for my soul.

I’ve told Jim that I’ve had to tell myself that the pain I’m feeling is all good towards healing. It means my body is healing and the nerves are alive and working. I have to try and think positive…at least when my body has the energy to think.


OH…as I was typing this (it took a couple hours) I decided at the end to treat myself to a Payday candy bar. I took one bite and felt something hard. I thought it was a bad peanut. Then I felt something strange in my mouth. I quickly learned that I broke one of my molars in half. Now I have to deal with the dentist. I can’t believe this happened!!! I hate (I mean really hate – totally anxiety attack hate) to sit in a dentist chair. I also immediately thought about the cost.

This is all starting to feel too much.